Impossible headlines..

[JEFF]

'Gerrard pulls out of England squad to assist mate,in this weeks Accrington Stanley SOS fundraisers'

Well the first part has happened

Steven Gerrard has pulled out of England's game against Belarus at Wembley after suffering a recurrence of a groin injury.

 

[Kiwi John]

CLUB POSTS 'UPDATE' for S.O.S. total.

 

[maccawozzagod]

club sends players and management to Darts Exhibition and Hare and Hounds fundraising night as promised

 

[katei77]

it was still a good nite even thought we ended up in a totally different pub and singing!

thou it wasnt such a good mornin for some ppl lol

 

[yerself]

Coleman admits "Ref's decision to award free-kick against Stanley was correct"

 

[Stevo]

HER MAJESTY'S REVENUE AND CUSTOMS AWARD ACCRINGTON STANLEY THEIR NEW GOLD AWARD...(FOR FOOTBALL LEAGUE CLUBS PROMPTLY PAYING OFF THEIR TAX BILL IN WORLD RECORD TIME!!!)
A.S.F.C receive a cheque for £1,000,000....!!
A spokesperson for HMRC said that if a small club like Accrington Stanley can pay up when required by HMRC then there should be no excuses for any larger clubs in the league to do the same....he had nothing but praise for the way in which they achieved their task!!!!

 

[Kiwi John]

Khan and O'Neil share car ride and a laugh, back to Accrington.

 

[Kiwi John]

" I made mistakes these last 8 weeks"-
O'Neil

 

[Fatso]

"O'Neil wins fans' approval."

 

[Kiwi John]

Marcelle speaks;does something.

 

[yerself]

Eric Whalley & Dave O'Neill open Business Management School.

 

[CLAYTON RED]

Clayton Red admits K.S.H was right

 

[simon]

Ilyas Khan has been asked to replace Marcelle Lazarus, by Dave O'Neil.

 

[yerself]

Ilyas Khan takes control of Accrington Stanley and appoints Doug as Chief Executive

 

[andyh]

Eric Whalley admits "It's all my Fault" !!

 

[smudgie]

Theres some beauties in here



"Dave O Neill wins the new BBC series Apprentice"

 

[Tealeaf]

Dave O'Neil adopted as prospective parliamentary candidate for Hyndburn Constituency​

"My manifesto shall be that of transparency and good governance...." he says.

 

[AccyAggro]

'Stanley have a kit for more than one season and is not 40 quid'

'Eric Whalley retires and instead of funding his children with his money gives it all to his beloved club'

 

[Greeny]

David O Neil wins BBC Sports Personality of the Year .

 

[fatgaz182]

"Russell Whalley wins £308,000 on 3 Legged Pit Pony and donates to ASFC"