lazy eye operation

If a child of mine wanted a purely cosmetic op to change the shape of their nose, ears etc then I would be against it because I'd feel it was unnecessary - but if a child of mine was disfigured and an op could change that then I would go for it. Those are two opposite ends of the spectrum.

If correcting a lazy eye was all that insignificant why would the NHS bother trying? The fact that they do indicates to me that they regard it as quite important to the child's quality of life.

In spite of what you were told I don't think most lay people would regard this lazy eye op as purely cosmetic because not having it will affect your son's childhood.

No operation is totally without possible danger but this really is a simple op. It might sound dramatic cutting into a muscle but that needs to be done because what is happening is that the muscle at one side is stronger than the other side and that is why the eye is pulled over to the side.

It sounds a little like you have already decided not to let him have the op and that you were looking for people to tell you that you've done the right thing. I can understand your worries as a mother. I've had plenty of times when I've been worried about my kids but I think it would help if you talked over your worries with the hospital anaesthetist who will know far more about any possible risks involved than any of us do.
 
My grandson had it done and I would say go for it, wouldn't even hesitate, made such a difference to his quality of life, no more name calling etc.
 
I have told the hospital that i will go ahead with the surgery as it gives me time to think about it before its done. if i said no straight away then i wouldnt be able to change my mind.. i dont know what to do... my sister didnt have the surgery because her mum (my dads ex-wife) was also told it was cosmetic.
 
It is cosmetic in as much as it isn't life saving but there's cosmetic and cosmetic if you know what I mean. Changeing some feature because you fancy a different look is, in my opinion, a pointless waste but correcting a defect is a different kettle of fish.

Did your sister ever have the op or does she still have a lazy eye? How does she feel about it? Would she rather it had been done?
 
she didnt have the op. she has special needs that affect her balance and development etc.. she doesnt really say much about it and she isnt bullied for it either
 
The op maybe cosmetic at the moment while hes young but maybe when he gets older they will be able to do something for his eyesight they are working things out all the time now it wasnt that long ago that they made the lazer surgery, i dont know what is wrong with his eyes but my daughter who is 8 now has very bad eyes she has (not sure how to spell it!) astygmatism and even with her glasses which are a high prescription when she is 17 her eyesight will be below the driving standard, she doesnt like to wear glasses and even more the thought that she will have to wear them forever contacts wont correct her eyes, if there was an op she could have so that she could wear contacts instead of glasses then i would let her have it even though it would be cosmetic and wouldnt change the fact that she would still need the aid of glasses/contacts.

I dont know if that makes sense but i know what i mean! lol

What im saying is what you do now might help him in the future and theres the fact that if he gets it done now he has less chance of remembering it later when he gets older, it might be more traumatic for him when hes older if he was to choose to get it done for himself.

But at the end of the day we can only give an opinion the decision is yours, i wish you all the luck. x
 
he knows that his eyes dont move together but since he has always had it, its normal to him.
 
Has no-one ever teased him or made fun of him about it? That could happen when he's at school. Kids can be awfully cruel.

I'm a bit puzzled that he's 6 and hasn't started school yet. Mine both started in reception class when they were 4.
 
emamum23 said:
if he doesnt have it soon it will be too late he is 6 now and they advise that they have it before they start school but its only just been offered
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i meant that it is supposed to be done before they start school but they have only just offered it to us. Nobody has bullied him because of his eyes and he never talks about it..
 
Em I would really think carefully about the reasons you don't want him to have this done. As you say he is only six but as he gets older he may not thank you for not having it done. Not trying to alarm you but really think that it will be something that is thrown out at him some time in the future. Kids really are cruel so please consider having it done.
 
Hi emamum
I had the operation done at a similar age when I was at primary school. Unfortunately, for me, the operation was not followed up by glasses and I still have problems.
At primary school, teasing was not a problem. At secondary school, it was a nightmare!
Have the specialists mentioned when your eyes are fully developed? Don't quote me, but by the time you reach 8 or 9 years, they stay as they are and won't change much. That's what I have been told, because I can not see out of my 'bad' eye properly, and there is now no way of rectifying it.
Children are so resilient. My nephew (age 5) has problems with his hearing and has had several operations. Within an hour of being home after an operation, he is running around like nothing has happened.
My advice is do not hesitate for one second, and proceed with the operation.
I am now 33 and wish that things could be different for me.
 
thankyou... that is exactly what i was hoping for, i am pretty sure we are going ahead with the surgery. I am scared, i would appeciate if you could share any experience of the actual operation so that i know what to prepare him for. thankyou
 
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emamum23 said:
i meant that it is supposed to be done before they start school but they have only just offered it to us. Nobody has bullied him because of his eyes and he never talks about it..
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Sorry. I had misunderstood when I read the first post. I'm glad to hear that nobody has bullied him yet because of it. One of my children has been the victim of bullying and it can make their life hell. As a parent you feel so helpless when something like that happens.
 
After reading the post by faoai and the pm sent.. i now know more than i did when i started the thread.. i would do anything for my son, but wouldnt put him through any unecessary stress (of what i was informed was cosmetic surgery). i now know what he will get from the surgery and what will (potentially) happen if he doesnt and that helps me make an informed decision about the surgery that he will be having.

These are the times i wish i wasnt a single parent....
 
my Ciara (niece) who is only 4 has been told she may need to have it done, but they have tried her with glasses first
 
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