I don't work. I don't have dependants, besides the house plants and the three fishes l have. My life has changed in so many ways in the last eighteen months.
Four years ago l was living in London. A job l loved in fashion. Travelling to America twice a year, well paid, and enjoying my little house and garden as well as three or four holidays a year. Sixteen years l did that, but was never really settled. Sure l had a wild time and met some interesting people, but it was a shallow life and l plucked up my courage and ventured off.
Not a major change still a city, Glasgow. Hard, beautiful, blond sandstone, windswept. Swapped little South London flat for swishy city centre luxury gaff, 2 beds, 2 baths, Concierge. Job working for Godfather's chain of 'adult' stores, not as well paid, but interesting! Social life was better than London, smaller, friendlier. But still a feeling of outsiderishness [a word?]
Eighteen months ago, after nearly twenty years away, I realise my heart is here. This mucky, industrial, friendly, moorland place l call home. Two months later, diagnosed with this bloody disease.
At first in shock/denial that this was happening to ME. I was always lucky, popular. Headboy, first class degree, never short of friends. Christ, l was the one who always volenteered to read the lesson at Church/School. Such as nice boy. Kind. God, if they only knew!
Twelve months of finding it hard to make friends, without a job to use as a springboard. People my age didn't go out, they went to P.T.A. meetings, not all night raves like l was used to!
Then one dark sleepless March night l saw a link to Accrington Web. My life changed. To those of you with busy lives you may not understand, but this has been such a Godsend to me.
l've met people. Salt of the earth people who phone me, come round, and though it's all new, care about me. l've been to the theatre, to a Wedding, to a football match. Some people l haven't met. Some l know through journals/ private messages or just reading the posts. Some l'll never meet, some l might, some l don't need to.
Then there's the Chatroom. There's us three. The family, plus welcome guests. I've been more honest as to who l really am, to my two friends in there, than l've ever had the nerve to be in this journal. Some people have found my openess here a challenge, but you only get half a story, and half of me. To my chat friends l can be honest. They know when l'm tired or down, or frisky even! l love them, and l thank them for having the time for me, and for the virtual cuddles and the other stuff.
Four years ago l was living in London. A job l loved in fashion. Travelling to America twice a year, well paid, and enjoying my little house and garden as well as three or four holidays a year. Sixteen years l did that, but was never really settled. Sure l had a wild time and met some interesting people, but it was a shallow life and l plucked up my courage and ventured off.
Not a major change still a city, Glasgow. Hard, beautiful, blond sandstone, windswept. Swapped little South London flat for swishy city centre luxury gaff, 2 beds, 2 baths, Concierge. Job working for Godfather's chain of 'adult' stores, not as well paid, but interesting! Social life was better than London, smaller, friendlier. But still a feeling of outsiderishness [a word?]
Eighteen months ago, after nearly twenty years away, I realise my heart is here. This mucky, industrial, friendly, moorland place l call home. Two months later, diagnosed with this bloody disease.
At first in shock/denial that this was happening to ME. I was always lucky, popular. Headboy, first class degree, never short of friends. Christ, l was the one who always volenteered to read the lesson at Church/School. Such as nice boy. Kind. God, if they only knew!
Twelve months of finding it hard to make friends, without a job to use as a springboard. People my age didn't go out, they went to P.T.A. meetings, not all night raves like l was used to!
Then one dark sleepless March night l saw a link to Accrington Web. My life changed. To those of you with busy lives you may not understand, but this has been such a Godsend to me.
l've met people. Salt of the earth people who phone me, come round, and though it's all new, care about me. l've been to the theatre, to a Wedding, to a football match. Some people l haven't met. Some l know through journals/ private messages or just reading the posts. Some l'll never meet, some l might, some l don't need to.
Then there's the Chatroom. There's us three. The family, plus welcome guests. I've been more honest as to who l really am, to my two friends in there, than l've ever had the nerve to be in this journal. Some people have found my openess here a challenge, but you only get half a story, and half of me. To my chat friends l can be honest. They know when l'm tired or down, or frisky even! l love them, and l thank them for having the time for me, and for the virtual cuddles and the other stuff.