What would be the harm......? That was a question that I was asking myself too......and the answer was......NONE at all. Except, it would be going against a principle that I had set for myself.......I asked myself would it really matter.....? I still felt uncomfortable about betraying a principle.......I don't think D*** though he was putting pressure on me.....and to be fair he had been very patient with me.
What was even harder, was that in truth I wanted to abandon myself to the passion that I too, felt.
We were sat there together and I told him that it was hard for me too.
I told him that I couldn't wait for the time when we could be together.....I told him that deep down I was scared.
'What on earth could you be scared of.......if you got pregnant it wouldn't matter.....we are being married in a couple of months?'
I told him that it mattered to me.....I also said 'what if I'm not good at 'it'.......I'm scared that when you see me undressed you will be disappointed......'
He looked at me and shook his head in disbelief. ' How can I make you see that I love you so much.....I can't wait to feel the touch of your skin on mine.....to kiss every part of you.......you are the most beautiful person in the world'
Soft tears crept down my cheeks and he wiped them away and kissed me gently. In my heart, I told myself that the next time we were truly alone, I would abandon my principles and give in to the desire that we both felt.
We composed ourselves and went downstairs. D***'s mother gave us a suspicious look as we walked in.....D*** noticed this and said that we had somethings to discuss about the wedding.......not that there was a lot of organising to do. We were not having a honeymoon and we were not having a 'do'.......it was a strictly shoe-string production.
At work there was an air of anticipation......I asked my manager if I could have some time off to get married.....he said 'When do you plan to get married then?' I told him we had planned for the Monday the 3rd of October at 10 oclock......he looked at the calendar in his office and said
'Why do you need time off......? You are on a 2-10 that week.....gives you plenty of time to get from the Register Office for a 2 o clock shift.....you'll even have time for a drink at the Shepherd's Rest'
It took me a minute or two to realise that he was joking......he said he would have to ask the general manager.
One of the women I worked with told me that her daughter was getting married the Saturday before us......she said she was dizzy with the organising of everything. She asked me where we were having a 'do'.....I told her....no 'do'.......no honeymoon, no wedding cake..... just a quick trip to the Register Office.
She looked dismayed and asked 'didn't you dream of getting married in a white dress...... being princess for the day.....?
I told her that I couldn't remember having a dream of a wedding like that.....and as for being princess for a day......I would rather be the Queen in my mans' heart.
The summer was fading and autumn was drawing near. I stayed with D*** and his mum for the August bank holiday.
D*** was again relegated to sleeping on the couch, while I slept in the big bed that was soon to be ours.
The Bank Holiday Monday was a glorious day.......we decided we would go for a leisurely walk. We didn't have a destination in mind.....we just set off and walked towards Gt Harwood......the sky was a lovely clear blue and the sun was warm against our backs......we walked as far as the Gamecock Pub...... by the side of the pub there is a path that leads through the fields to Whalley Nab......we climbed over the fence and made our way across the field......we walked for a little way and then we sat down in a little depression......the grass was cool against the skin of my legs......D*** put his jacket down for us to sit on......we lay back and looked at the sky.
D*** turned to me and kissed me......gently at first and then with more urgency.....he put his arm across my body and hugged me close to him.....he began to unbutton my dress........as he undid the buttons he kissed the exposed flesh......I was powerless to resist.
Before long we were down to my underwear.....his hands caressed my skin and explored my body.....I made a low moan.....No..... No..... YES...yes yes......oh my god......My body rose and fell on the waves of passion.........I was trembling.........and my principles were shattered! To be continued.
What was even harder, was that in truth I wanted to abandon myself to the passion that I too, felt.
We were sat there together and I told him that it was hard for me too.
I told him that I couldn't wait for the time when we could be together.....I told him that deep down I was scared.
'What on earth could you be scared of.......if you got pregnant it wouldn't matter.....we are being married in a couple of months?'
I told him that it mattered to me.....I also said 'what if I'm not good at 'it'.......I'm scared that when you see me undressed you will be disappointed......'
He looked at me and shook his head in disbelief. ' How can I make you see that I love you so much.....I can't wait to feel the touch of your skin on mine.....to kiss every part of you.......you are the most beautiful person in the world'
Soft tears crept down my cheeks and he wiped them away and kissed me gently. In my heart, I told myself that the next time we were truly alone, I would abandon my principles and give in to the desire that we both felt.
We composed ourselves and went downstairs. D***'s mother gave us a suspicious look as we walked in.....D*** noticed this and said that we had somethings to discuss about the wedding.......not that there was a lot of organising to do. We were not having a honeymoon and we were not having a 'do'.......it was a strictly shoe-string production.
At work there was an air of anticipation......I asked my manager if I could have some time off to get married.....he said 'When do you plan to get married then?' I told him we had planned for the Monday the 3rd of October at 10 oclock......he looked at the calendar in his office and said
'Why do you need time off......? You are on a 2-10 that week.....gives you plenty of time to get from the Register Office for a 2 o clock shift.....you'll even have time for a drink at the Shepherd's Rest'
It took me a minute or two to realise that he was joking......he said he would have to ask the general manager.
One of the women I worked with told me that her daughter was getting married the Saturday before us......she said she was dizzy with the organising of everything. She asked me where we were having a 'do'.....I told her....no 'do'.......no honeymoon, no wedding cake..... just a quick trip to the Register Office.
She looked dismayed and asked 'didn't you dream of getting married in a white dress...... being princess for the day.....?
I told her that I couldn't remember having a dream of a wedding like that.....and as for being princess for a day......I would rather be the Queen in my mans' heart.
The summer was fading and autumn was drawing near. I stayed with D*** and his mum for the August bank holiday.
D*** was again relegated to sleeping on the couch, while I slept in the big bed that was soon to be ours.
The Bank Holiday Monday was a glorious day.......we decided we would go for a leisurely walk. We didn't have a destination in mind.....we just set off and walked towards Gt Harwood......the sky was a lovely clear blue and the sun was warm against our backs......we walked as far as the Gamecock Pub...... by the side of the pub there is a path that leads through the fields to Whalley Nab......we climbed over the fence and made our way across the field......we walked for a little way and then we sat down in a little depression......the grass was cool against the skin of my legs......D*** put his jacket down for us to sit on......we lay back and looked at the sky.
D*** turned to me and kissed me......gently at first and then with more urgency.....he put his arm across my body and hugged me close to him.....he began to unbutton my dress........as he undid the buttons he kissed the exposed flesh......I was powerless to resist.
Before long we were down to my underwear.....his hands caressed my skin and explored my body.....I made a low moan.....No..... No..... YES...yes yes......oh my god......My body rose and fell on the waves of passion.........I was trembling.........and my principles were shattered! To be continued.
