Adoption
 

Groove wonders what Accywebbers think on the issue of gay couples addopting...Although they would be just as competent as heterosexual couples, is it right to have a child brought up by a gay couple?

Re: Adoption
 

Working in the town centre and seeing the number of unfit hetrosexual parents who leave a lot to be desired I'd say they can't do any worse.

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Regarding heterosexual parents in the town centre, can totally see your point Dave

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nothing at all wrong with gay couples adopting, 2 parents are better than no parents no matter what sex they are

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Groove thinks certain kids with homosexual parents will get some stick off other pupils. We all know how cruel kids can be...Groove thinks this factor has been overlooked by fellow posters.

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my sister in law and sister in law have a daughter they are the same as other parents they're just both women. kids get picked on for all sorts of reasons, are we going to stop kids wearing glasses,having ginger hair,being different to the rest of the herd in case they get bullies?

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Why?

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Groove thinks word on the playground would be 'suchabody does'nt have a real mum n dad, suchabodys mum and dad are lesbos'...not grooves views, merely grooves presumption on this issue.

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Mavis Davis thinks Groove will be left in the orphanage.

As no one will be that desperate for a child.

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What about the kids of heterosexual parents who get teased because their daddy has another girlfriend?

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Do you think children are born thinking these things? children dont care, they are taught that things are 'wrong' and 'different' they dont form those views themselves (usually) there are different variations of normal and it would be a much better world if these variations were accepted instead of attacked.....

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...and all the kid has to do is threaten the bullies that "my dad will get your dad". Some of the todger do.....I mean 'women with same sex partners' that I know would more than hold their own in a fight with a man.

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grooves mum is still considering abortion :eek:

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Na I think his mother through the wrong bit away;)

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My concern would be that the child would grow up thinking that being gay is "normal" and are more likely to grow up to become gay themselves. In a similar way to fact that if a child's parents smoke the child is more likely to take up smoking as they see it as the "norm".

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That is barmy steve, people don't choose to be gay, its not a lifestyle choice, that is how they are born, end of story

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Gay children are the product of heterosexual parents.

How come they don't grow up aping the sexual orientation of their parent/role models?

Is it perhaps that sexual orientation is genetically preordained, like height, eye-colour, or level of stupidness?

People are born gay.

Just as some are born thick.

Since we can't decide on our height, or hair colour, the sexual orientation a person's born with, is the 'norm'.

Whatever that might be.

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Great answer Rindi

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Maybe in most cases, but when I was a kid I lived up the top of Fielding Lane and on a farm near us lived a farmer, his wife and thier two sons. One son was your typical strapping farm lad, the other, younger son was as gay as a lord. My mum was friends with the farmers wife and she told her that when the second son was born she really wanted a girl and for the first few years of his life he was basically brought up as a girl even to the point of wearing dresses and playing with girls toys. Could be just a coincidence but I'm not so sure.

Re: Adoption
 

Mavis Davis wonders why some people don't do a simple search, using the handy forum search facility, so we don't replicate subjects that have been discussed in depth already.

http://www.accringtonweb.com/forum/f...ion-28044.html

:rolleyes:

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See.

Genetics.

Some are born dimmer than others.

:rolleyes:

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If the lad was gay he was born gay steve, no two ways about it

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I take it you haven't ever travelled much further than Fielding Lane?

There are plenty of tattooed, knuckle scraping, rugby playing, gay men, who wouldn't know a scatter cushion if you hit him on the head with it.

Just as there are many totally straight, weak little men, who love nothing better than shopping with their wives for just the right shade of lilac potpourri.

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What was your mother hoping for?

Disappointment can be such a terrible burden.

:rolleyes:

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I'm not so sure, I think any behaviour can be influenced.

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Not sure, but I played with Action Men!

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...the toys, that is!!

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Dolls.

That's nice.

I believe some boys like playing with them, and it should be encouraged.

It will help your femininity to flourish.

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Really?

So when exactly did you make the conscious decision as to what sex you were going to be attracted to?

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Yeah, but mine had guns and an armoured car.

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Ya Ken Pilling the manager at the Merchants in Blackburn were no wall flower Rindi;)

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Your opinion, and you're entitled to it.

Personally, when I don't have the foggiest idea about something, the politics of the Middle East, long division, the life cycle of the May fly, I tend to keep my opinions to myself.

Keeping my gob firmly shut means I don't risk looking like an idiot in public.

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Just adding my four penneth - we'll agree to disagree then...

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So what age were you, when you made the conscious choice as to whether you were going to be attracted to males, or females?

It's interesting.

Most people already know. Almost as if it's built in to who you are as a person.

You're in a minority, having a choice.

Men, or women.

Most people already know, and have no choice..

Perhaps it's just bisexuals who get to decide.

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What I've found out, on life's long journey, is that most totally straight men couldn't give a toss about gay men.

Confident as they are in their own sexuality, and certainly not threatened by it, and who secretly think 'good, more women for me!'

It's usually the ones who jump up and down, shouting about it not being 'normal', who usually have a deep seated desire to bend over, and take it like a beach.

:rolleyes:

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There must be some cases, however small a percentage, where outside influences have a bearing on whether someone's gay or not. But as you say I'm no expert.

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Perhaps there is.

Those born 50/50 bisexual.

They'll get a choice.

You never told us.

At what age did you decide on the gender you were going to be attracted to?

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What, on biology?

Fair enough.

As I said, on subjects I know nowt about I tend to keep my gob shut, and not spout a whole load of crap, so as not to appear like an idiot.

;)

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I think you dont make a conscious decision to fancy men or women it just happens , putting dresses on boys doesnt make them gay as the saying goes just because you were born in a stable does not make you a horse.i also think just because childrens parents are same sex it wont make their kids gay, they either are already or not , i can say from knowing a same sex couple who have brought up a son he is 100% hetro and he lived with his dad and his partner from being about 2 years old.

Re: Adoption
 

Which Lord?

Nelson, our greatest navel hero?

Archer, prossy visiting politican?

Byron, 'bad, mad, and dangerous to know', from whom no gentleman's daughter was safe from?

Lord Alan Sugar?

As you weren't specific enough....you're fired.

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Mmm, maybe "idiot" and "crap" is bit strong a words. My first post on the subject put forward the suggestion that being brought up by a same sex couple might have a bearing future sexual orientation. I saw it more as adding fuel to the debate rather than having any scientific basis.

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I was just "painting a picture" with that phrase - thought it was as good as any.

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I was refering to myself, you silly billy.

Calm down. You'll give yourself a queer turn.

I said 'I' tend to keep my gob shut, when ill informed, so as not to talk crap, and risk looking a right idiot in public.

;)

As for your claim, it was answered by the facts in the earlier post, that gay children grow up with heterosexual parents, but don't ape their sexual orientation.

Thus proving, as science agrees with, that sexual orientation is genetically preordained.

Unless you know different, and made a conscious choice.

:rolleyes:

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But surely your statement has to be based on something if not science then what, sexual orientation is 100% nature, nurture may have influence on some things like treatment of women (domestic violence etc ) where children see physical abuse everyday as "normal" but sexual orientation is a chemical thing not a reaction borne from conditioning through exposure.

Re: Adoption
 

Agreed ... spot on, and succinct ... but as this won't put a stop to this redundant thread, I will add my two cents worth: I wonder what Sarah Palin's take is on all this:rolleyes:;):D

Although homophobia is nonesense, and should be right up there with racism and flat earth theories as something that should have withered on the vine years ago, we still have gay bashers and rascists:confused: I can see no reason (as in "rational") why this should be so ... nor can I see any reason why those who vote for a particular type of political party ... the more righter, the more bigoteder ... or practice a certain type of religion (usually extreme), or live in a certain part of the world (Middle America:rolleyes:) should be more likely to be homophobic than folks from Montreal. I think Garinda is right; some folks is just born thick as ten short planks.:mosher:

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You are trying to tell me that the earth isnt flat next you will be saying that the moons not made of cheese:D

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Ok.

Whatever floats your boat.

Some could read it as juvenile, not relevant, out of context, or even just offensive.

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Did both your parents wear silly little hats, have tattoos, and play the guitar?

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You thought 'as gay as a lord' was as good as any?

Ok.

Proves the point.

Stupidness, like sexual orientation, is genetically preordained.

:gooddog:

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I personally think that as long as the child is safe, looked after and brought up to be a decent person what does it matter if they have same sex parents.

As said in previous posts kids will pick on other kids for anything. Its the way of life.

All these familys that you read about that have a Mum & Dad that abuse and mis-treat thier children is the worry not whether same sex parents should have the right to bring up a child.

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:rofl38::rofl38::rofl38::rofl38::rofl38::rofl38::rofl38:

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I would never go that far;)

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Thanks eric:D

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Well, I'm about ready to draw a line under this. Was just seeing it from a different angle and don't think I said anything particularly homophobic, because I'm not!

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Sorry.

Scrub that.

I've just noticed it's a headscarf, with a pretty print of Leylandii on it.

Not a silly little hat.

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What was the description of a boy as 'gay as a lord'

Besides nonsense.

Was it relevant to the discussion?

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As well as giving so much detail as to where he lived, what his parents did, the sex of his sibling, that you might as well have named him.

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Probably wise.

(If that's not too ironic.)

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Tattoo's? Nah, think that's my watch!

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The "as a lord" may have been unneccessary. He was a adult when I was a boy.

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Steve, if you had a child and the child turned out to be gay.. who's 'fault' would it be?

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Exactly.

Just 60 babies adopted last year in England | Society | The Guardian

If I was a orphan, rather than a miserable chilhood spent in care, I'd much rather be part of a loving family.
Regardless of the gender of the parents.

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Its living enviroment of course:rolleyes::rolleyes:

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From all the details you posted about him, besides him being as 'gay as a lord', lots of people will sadly now know exactly who you mean.

Did you ask, before discussing his life, on a public forum?

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If you'd have said as 'gay as a boy wearing a Roman style frock', we'd have known what you meant.

;)

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Me too G, I wouldnt mind at all as long as I was being looked after and was happy :)

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Maybe so, but I havn't said any derogatory about the guy, I've just said what anyone who actually knows him probably already know.

Flashy, if a child of mine turned out to be gay, no, I couldn't "blame" the environment. But as I said many posts ago, environment might have an effect in some cases.

If I put one of these ;) in my post will it make it seem more light-hearted? I have a feeling it's getting too serious!

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haha, hope that's not breaking forum rules!:confused:

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You've discussed the sexuality of someone, who from all the details you gave, is easily identifiable.

That is bang out of order.

Unless you asked, if he, and his family mind their private business being discussed on a public forum?

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What?

Googling nob in a frock, and posting the result?

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You're the nob?

Like no way!!!

What are the chances of that?

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Privacy's very important to some people.

I bet the person you discussed in so much detail thinks that too.

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It's amazing that one (what I thought was an) innocent post can lead to this. I suggest we call a truce!

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No, everyone's laughing.

It's ages since we've had a simple-minded soul wander into the village.

;)

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Don't give up your day job, by the way.

There'll never be much call for a Bangles tribute band round these parts.

;)

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Don't play any Bangles...havn't got the legs.

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Sounded like a bad Bangles licky-likey tribute.

Definitely came across as more Manic Monday, than Black Sabath.

;)

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Quite possibly, but it might have been an old vid...and I know more chords now.

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Exactly.

If sexual orientation was a learned thing, nurture, rather than nature, there wouldn't be any gays at all.

As every single gay/lesbian child is a result of a heterosexual pairing.

So who learned/influenced them to be homosexual, and not their siblings?

Velma, from Scooby Doo?

Re: Adoption
 

Outdated videos, outdated views.

I see a theme developing here.

:rolleyes:

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Thelma's a lesbian!?......Zoinks!!

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Oh dear.

We didn't want you to know, and be influenced by this fact.

Because now you'll be a lesbian too.

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as long as the child is brought up in a loving environment, cared for, clothed & fed who gives a flying u know what about the sex of the parents, what relevance does it have? It's like saying a boy should only be brought up by a man, and girls brought up by females if there from a single parent family, it doesn't matter, a boy brought up by lesbians will have male influences in his life & vice versa, groove needs to join the 21st century.

Re: Adoption
 

Well, since I logged of last night this thread has taken off and has been flying at 20,000'.
As fare as I'm concerned it was an emotive subject from the start, especially when it went down the road of whether people choose their sexuality. This is a subject I've always felt strong about, having work with lots of gay people both male and female in the nightclub industry, in fact (I have mentioned this before on here but I'll repeat it for the sake of new contributors to the site) a few years ago when working at a local nightclub together with my then wife, we were having a drink after the club had closed and the wife (who was very naive) said to the barman, who was gay, why is it, when there are all these young girls in here every night wearing low cut blouses and short skirts, that you fancy other men, the reply was succinct and to the point, I'm a victim of circumstance, I have the mind of a woman in a mans body, think that says it all really

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Well put, John. As for the Bangles and Black Sabbath, I liked the Bangles but did not care for Black Sabbath. A bit too crash, bang wallop for me!

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Yes, nice summary. It did spiral out of control a bit didn't it.

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At least you kept your cool and did not rise to the personal comments.

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Yeah, not really my style. Think they were heat of the moment things this time tomorrow Garinda and me will porobably be best buddies!!....The Bangles jibe did cut deep though!!!

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You and Garinda might well be best buddies this time tomorrow, but I've still got plenty of "issues" with you...like your appalling prog rock musical tastes and your football traitorship to your home town, to name but two!

You have been warned! :eek:

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"Traitor" Never! Stanley are my "second" team. As for the music, I can offer no defence....but I have given a couple of your obscure tracks a spin in the past and they were alright....but not really for me.

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Alright, well, we'll return to musical matters at a later date, but if Stanley are your second team, I expect to see on the Clayton End sometime soon. You can even search out Alvin and discuss Yes concept albums at halftime. ;)

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So you'll be sticking to ABBA, Duran Duran and Spandau Ballet, then steve;):D

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I do have a penchant for the 80's and actually like 'em better know than I did at the time.....I will say no more than that!

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As opposed to the very personal comments he decided to make about someone, and their family, on a public forum?

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Gary, you are like a dog with a bone!!! Can we not let this go? I'm sure people can read my first post and make their own minds up if I was out of order.

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Blimey, lost your sense of humour?

A little gentle teasing only funny, when it's at someone else's expense?

Still, we won't hold it against you.

It's probably genetic.

:rofl38:

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Really don't think I've "teased" anyone in any of my posts. And as I've said a few times now I'm ready to end these tit-for-tat posts.

Re: Adoption
 

What about the person you identified, who you described as 'gay as a lord'?

He might fee he was teased.

Or his family, who you also identified.

Or perhaps any Lords.

Or even any gays.

You can end your contribution to the thread anytime you like.

No one's forcing you to post.

As you're on a certain loser, for your own sake, it's probably wiser to do it sooner, rather than later.

;)

Re: Adoption
 

People read your first post

...and every subsequent poster disagreed with what you said.

Your second post

...was bang out of order because you chose to identify someone, and their family, and discuss their private business.

Your childish 'gay as a lord' comment, was totally irrelevant to the thread's subject, and could be deemed as being offensive, by some.

Re: Adoption
 

I didn't name anyone. Only retold a tale that's 30 odd years old to illustrate a point. Anyone who wants to can look back at the posts and comment and if they think I'm out of order I'll hold my hands up (which I might have already done, I can't even remember now) You seem to thrive on confrontation! I know you don't always have an easy time of it and I have every sympathy but it seems like your taking things out on me a bit. Putting a smiley icon at the end of your posts doesn't make them hurt any less!