50 shades of Grey/Accrington

claytonx · 20-07-2012, 12:33

Even though he only had one tattoo I yearned for him to fill the lonely hours between Jeremy Kyle and Eastenders. As he approached me with his pasty white arms hanging out of a Nike vest,his smile told me it was dole day.
As I stood in line at the jobcentre thinking up reasons why I can't work,a sweet smell drifted past my pig like nostrils.It was a mixture of weed,sweat and Lynx Africa!
I turned and there he was ,Dwayne,with his pants halfway down his arse,our eyes met and soon he was lifting me onto the wheelie bins behind Marks. He had already tied his staffy to a post in an alleyway so we would not be disturbed.There was a tramp watching but it did not bother us,just added to the mystery. I knew then that this was love and my life would never be the same again.
I made a promise to him there and then that I would buy him a big screen plasma with the baby bonus.....

MargaretR · 20-07-2012, 12:50

I have read this before on a newspaper site.
A woman in the north east has been blogging her version of 50 shades of grey and her readers are trying to persuade her to get it published.

claytonx · 20-07-2012, 12:56

Quote:

Originally Posted by MargaretR

I have read this before on a newspaper site.
A woman in the north east has been blogging her version of 50 shades of grey and her readers are trying to persuade her to get it published.

Margaret I got it in a email from a friend in Australia.

Restless · 20-07-2012, 15:59

I swear I am going to have a meltdown if I hear about this turd novel one more time this week

Less · 20-07-2012, 16:05

Quote:

Originally Posted by claytonx

Margaret I got it in a email from a friend in Australia.

Have the decency to acknowledge that fact rather than copy and paste rubbish as your source, please.

Or even better ban the folk sending it to you, or don't post it.

susie123 · 20-07-2012, 16:21

Quote:

Originally Posted by Restless

I swear I am going to have a meltdown if I hear about this turd novel one more time this week

You and me both, Rob.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Less

Have the decency to acknowledge that fact rather than copy and paste rubbish as your source, please.

Or even better ban the folk sending it to you, or don't post it.

Hear hear.

Gremlin · 20-07-2012, 19:01

What am I missing?

susie123 · 20-07-2012, 19:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gremlin

What am I missing?

There you go, Gremlin... betcha wish you hadn't asked...

Fifty Shades of Grey - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

lancsdave · 20-07-2012, 19:19

Quote:

Originally Posted by claytonx

Even though he only had one tattoo I yearned for him to fill the lonely hours between Jeremy Kyle and Eastenders. As he approached me with his pasty white arms hanging out of a Nike vest,his smile told me it was dole day.
As I stood in line at the jobcentre thinking up reasons why I can't work,a sweet smell drifted past my pig like nostrils.It was a mixture of weed,sweat and Lynx Africa!
I turned and there he was ,Dwayne,with his pants halfway down his arse,our eyes met and soon he was lifting me onto the wheelie bins behind Marks. He had already tied his staffy to a post in an alleyway so we would not be disturbed.There was a tramp watching but it did not bother us,just added to the mystery. I knew then that this was love and my life would never be the same again.
I made a promise to him there and then that I would buy him a big screen plasma with the baby bonus.....

There is an actual discrepancy which means it can't be in Accrington

Quote:

and soon he was lifting me onto the wheelie bins behind Marks

It would have read between the sharps bins in the alley way at the side of Maundy

Margaret Pilkington · 20-07-2012, 19:19

absolutely nothing...it is all media hype......the writing is juvenile, the story is contrived, but people buy it because of what the papers/media say about it.
'If you read what everyone else is reading, then you are inclined to think what everyone elses is thinking'(Haruki Murukami)...fortunately I have not lost my powers of thought or reasoning and can make my own decisions about what is good. I do not need the press, the media or the critics to tell me.