Internet relationships

[slinky]

Originally Posted by Tinkerbelle

Is that the new terminology for to smooth out the wrinkles

yes it could be gotcha hahaha

[Madhatter]

A lot of people trapped in the wrong relationship meet on the net, sometimes both are, and it takes a lot of trust for each to commit to each other and leave the past behind. Because of the situation it's very easy to lose trust part way in, not just because of the past relationship that lingering there but because they're often still chatting to others on the net. It's very easy to get jelous and lose trust. It's also very easy for others to get jelous and put the knife in, the past partner and others on the net.
In my experience most people are either addicted to the net and therefore they'll always get bored and go back on there and start looking again or the theirs an 'ex' in there or even a partner.
I've learned a lot in the past 7 months, it took a few people to get it to sink in what happened but I see it now. It would never have worked.

[WillowTheWhisp]

That may sound like sensible advice from a 16 year old but there are a couple of things she maybe hasn't considered.

When you chat to someone online, even if they have a webcam and a mike and you can see and hear them you still haven't really got a natural situation. It's easy for people to put on an act on the net. Also if you are chatting to someone long distance then you are less likely to know anyone else who knows them which means they can pretend to be something they are not and there's no-one around to make you any the wiser.

A few years ago someone I "knew" on AOL from the quizzes (I still miss those quizzes) found a "boyfriend" in a chatroom. They only contacted each other by IM or chatted in the rooms. He didn't have a webcam, although she did, so she never saw him. Eventually she found out that he had lied to her about his age and was 20 years older than he'd claimed to be!

Last summer we watched a TV documentary about two young lads who had formed a friendship on the net and yet there were sinister undertones and one almost talked the other one into murder. I know that's extreme but it was frightening how the friendship developed in such a way that the gullible lad was sucked deeper and deeper in without realising that what he was ending up doing was totally out of character.

Then there's the point about arranging to meet someone you've chatted to online. I know it's a cliche but for all you know they could be a mad axe-man(woman) or a pervert. It's better to meet on neutral ground in a busy place.

Having said that I know that people do "meet" online and do form lasting relationships so it isn't all doom and gloom and maybe it's easier to chat by typing than to talk to someone face to face in a first meeting.

[garinda]

She said she's at present nearly sixteen, meaning she's now fifteen, and that for a couple of years that she has had 'relationships' with these older men she met over the internet.

If any of my female relatives were aged thirteen and meeting men to have 'relationships' with them, I'd be very worried.