Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Bloody daft ! :D Friday night stalking along the Canal, the only canal I'd be alongside of would be a Pub called the "Canal". ;)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

You haven't got the hang of this dog warden job yet have you?
Your supposed to watch for a dog in action not stare at the droppings
:hidewall:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

This is a serious observation of floating debris and the effect canal flow can have on the debris. It is something that has to be taken seriously as the outcome could be catastrophic.

I will at sometime be asking for volunteers, people who have posted on this thread are automaticaly enroled.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Dont forget my clipboard though:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Its in the post.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Wow, I aint been on for a couple of days but I think your all going a bit doolally.......................................... .........;)

Whats happened?! :D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Claytoners Heth, We humour em.:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

No problem, DIG & I will set up the nerve centre in this pub he thinks he knows called The Canal.:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Couldn't agree more, nothing more serious than getting Ale down yer neck on a Friday night ! :D

Pint of Bitter Less ? :)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Am I invited???

I can do dolally and talk about a fire extinguisher if a pint is involved!

:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Now why am I not surprised ? You've got no morals you, you set yourself low standards & fail to achieve even them ! Course you can :s_aim1:

D'ya want some scratchins with your Pint an' all ?

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

No thanks they will repeat on me all night and I am sure you dont want me passing wind while we have a serious job of watching the disguised aliens.

Just alcohol please!
:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

No class whatsoever ! :rolleyes:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

That could be very handy fer moving it along from were its been lurking.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Well, I'm not sure about that, with so many people hanging around the edge of such a large volume of water accidents can easily happen so someone needs to be prepared for an emergency.
Better make it at least four pints so that that someone isn't me.
:alright:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

That's why we've got Heth & look, she's already wearing her life jacket. :flasher8: :s_aim1:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Thats right pick on the girl!! ;)

I wouldnt be able to hurl you big lumps outa the water now will I?!

I am a ladeeeeeeeeeeeeeee :D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Oooh, naughty boy nearly got me banned again, I straight away thought of a joke about her having to show us her trollies, but fortunately I didn't fall into the trap, after all most of the trollies around there come from asda.:cool:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Oh I don't know, you could probably do a Papunzel to rescue us should we go in. :D

(no, no spelling mistake, have a think about it) ;)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

We'll be right mate, not only is the Boozer a free house, it's also a safe house. They've even lined the attic with tinfoil so I've heard. :)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

:s_aim1:

Shocking you are, really shocking!!

I only wanted to be part of the gang and have a few beers now look whats happened!! ;)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

is that part of the gang or part of the chliqke? :p

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Gang for me all the way, none of this click/clique business. Seems like too much hassle ;)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

It's a sign of acceptance & it means you can "hang" with the lads. :s_aim1:

(in fact, you can hang twice as much as us :eek:)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

A free house Mmmmmm, with tin foil sounds like we're having a barbi'
I think I once started a thread about a barbi somewhere on here, can't remember how it ends...


Come to think of it I can't remember how any barbi I've been to ends!
:eek:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Does that mean I can have twice as many drinks?! :eek:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Badly, most definitely badly, also usually black & crunchy & those are just the bogeys up yer nose, the meat has gone from crackling to crematoria & the endless Beer, but I'll struggle along manfully. :D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Steady, equality only goes so far I'll have you know. :)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Bit of thread wondering here chaps, any progress on the Fire extinguisher:rolleyes:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Agreed, but it does you good to have a wonder now & then, just think were we'd be if someone hadn't wondered, what happens when I do this while doing that ? Probably somewhere mentioned in the Darwins back catalogues. :D

And anyway, if you read carefully it's kinda relevant as we were referring to setting up a nerve centre (admittedly in a Pub & all that entails) to collate all the incoming data, info & intelligence (????? :D) being generated on the subject matter.

Then that Heth came along & well, total disruption to the programme ! :thankya:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Dave heth is a woman and thats what women do:D:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Very brave or very foolish, haven't quite decided just yet. :D You might want to get yourself one of these :hidewall:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Eric for your perusal & those who may also be interested, some of Dr. B.Loxs fine works, which I managed to unearth from my vast library of tatty paperbacks, Gentlemans browsing material & back issues of Guns & Ammo. :D

In answer to Erics question in post 279, the good Doctor as previously mentioned produced a dissertation on the youth & society of the time (late 90’s) entitled “Saturday night & sheetfaced” & from this we can ascertain various conclusions

Adolescentis Hornius (Randy teen) usually male, will stoop to any lengths to in the vernacular of the period “Cop a feel” or “Get his end away” even resorting to Alcohol, deception & outright lies as a means to this end. Usually found in groups, skulking away doing something illicit awaiting whatever opportunities may arise. There will be a hierarchy within the “gang” but this will be dependent on social status, background & who’s the hardest or the gangs geek.

Slutus Inebriatus (Local Bike) although this appellation is somewhat misrepresentative of the young female in question, she with her friends will no doubt experiment with Alcohol & sexuality in all probably at the same time (or at least that is the conception of A.H) therefore making her fair game, should this not be the case A.H. will have no qualms about trying it on with one of her best mates. (so, from this perspective the epithet Slutus, sits more so with the male as the female of the species)

Should our young mattress matador receive the proverbial swift kick in the nads (either figuratively or eye wateringly for real) apart from being in his own little world of nadular agony, he will simply walk/ hobble back to his mates with empty boasts or proclamations of the denying females sexual orientation. To wit, the comments will run along the typical vein of “No chance there, she’s a proper Lezzer ! And she’s right ugly anyway ! Come on let’s go beat something up !”


Hopefully these chapters taken from Prof. B.Loxs Masters in - I.D.K.S. - N.R.I.D.K.S. - I.R.A.T.B. rather perceptive & timely discourse should help answer some of the questions raised by Mr.Eric of Canada

And what has it to do with the canal of this thread ? I refer you to the unsightly creature “Phallus Coverus” also mentioned by Mr.Eric of Canada oft times found floating in said canal.

Phallus Coverus (Gentlemans Jerkin/Love glove/Salami sling) an inert parasitic creature, lives a secretive life tucked away in a darkened & preferably locked drawer, other locations include crumpled up in the folds of a wallet, or the terrifying recesses & mystical depths of a Handbag. Parasitic in that it requires a host (even better when it’s two hosts) to bring about it’s latent excitability, the life span is very short (minutes if you’re lucky) but extremely intense, after this brief explosive burst of life the Salami sling will slip away into the ignominy of the lavvy/cut/bushes.

(excerpt from “Saturday night & sheetfaced” by Prof B.Loxs blah de blah de blah)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Finally, we can get back to some serious discussion. What are Professor Loxs views on the metamorphic qualities of slutus inebriatus? It's ability to transform itself from a state of chickus super-hottus to a form known as porcus ditchus in a matter of a few short hours. One of nature's greatest mysteries!

I have been unable to get a hold of "Saturday night & sheetfaced" ... but I do know that Dr. Unken Asshollen (the famous Finnish sociologist and parrot whisperer) holds it in high regard. It is mentioned and quoted in his two papers: "Trashed in Todmorden" and "Plastered in Padiham". I also look forward, as should we all, to his upcoming "Hammered in Hynburn" published by The Railway Clique Press.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Something to do with beer goggles innit?

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

I shall endeavour to find some gemlet of the fine Doctors work into the subject for you Eric, I do believe it was a later study of his :) also "R" my thanks to you for your interest in this topic (although I'm uncertain of exactly who you are :o)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Were you inspired by the Monty Python 'Biggus Dickus' sketch?
...or is this how boys usually 'talk dirty' ....using pig latin?

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Our inspiration is our thirst for knowledge ... ok, and beer;)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

No, no Monty here, perhaps some motley though & as to boys I suppose compared to yourself & your advanced years of experience, we are mere youngsters & deserving of the name. ;)

As to the Pig thing, there's an expression used by some folk "Everything but the squeal", I would suggest that now we are also recycling that squeal, see no waste. :D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Cheers, :cheers: my Scholarly companion of the net (or should that be Skol ?) :D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Salut to you too;)

And it's Satruday night; so, as Mahler wrote in "Der Trinker im Fruhling" ... and it's certainly Fruhling here right now; though there is snow forecast for monday:mad: ... "Last mich betrunken sein"!

We should start a clik/klik/clique etc. called "Fellowship of the Hat" ... only folks who've been there can join;)

By the way, I do believe that Dr. Loxs did some research in The Hat. That was after he did a stint at the Univeristy of Tuktoyaktuk ... Go Tuk U:theband:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Something tells me I'm going to scratch pork wieners off my shopping list;)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Na Dave I'll be okay, heth won't be on here for a day or two, so she won't see it:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Ah, the very idea, our motto "If you've not been in the bin, you're not getting in !" :D

note to mods, it loosely equates to this thread, there's a river & most definitely Alcohol plays a major part. :rolleyz8:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

I'm away for two minutes and the thread descends into barmpot, lets get this back on target.

It appears that the extinguisher is poised for movement again.

It has positioned itself ready to catch the wake of a turbulent passing, as you will see from the photos it is using the ducks and ducklings to move closer to the bridge and passing barges are helping the positioning.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

ah but dave-- you haven't pointed out the obvious. The BALL Is gaining on the Fire Extinguisher :eek:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

I have to say I never noticed that, but I don't have any theory regarding spherical objects. So will open up the thread for anyone who can support the theory about spherics, but this will have to be supported by photos, or other evidence.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

When I took this photo I got the feeling that I was being watched?

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

HAHAHA

I would hand out Karma but the site says I have been splashing it around to much in the last 24 hours

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

OI you!

Yes I am a woman and always remember we dont miss a trick!

:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

That is funny!!
:D

Notice anything else unusual?

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Have you spotted something I havent ?

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Nope just asking if anything else was recorded on this siting thats all..................

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Oh oh jaysays in trouble:hidewall::boxing_sm:boxing_sm:knife:::D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

It's probably just the strain and stress of the dilligent observations that you are making. I don't know if anyone has suggested this, but wouldn't it be possible to put a webcam in place so that we can observe in real time? This would certainly take some of the pressure off your good self. And if it were online, no doubt there would be millions world-wide who could share the excitement. Think what a boost it would be to the Hyndburn economy as tens of thousands of tourists flood into Clayton to observe the delicate ballet of objects floating in the cut. Of course, there would be the apocalyptic weirdos (probably from places like West Virginia and Glossop) who would come to watch the end of the world in the event there is an inter-galactic battle.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

I still believe that folks haven't paid enough attention to the importance of the ducks in this equation.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Shucks just can't trust women, they always do the unexpected:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Ya women are so unpredictable Dave:o:o:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Looks to me like the extinguisher is gathering its forces. All those bottles have just been waiting for a leader to show up.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

I have to say sitting in a hide on cold nights is taking its toll, but I have uncovered something strange about the extinguisher, I am just double checking my facts before I post the evidence on here, as it could rock Accy Web to its foundations

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Quite a lot of action today. Bit of a territory war between the fire extinguisher and the balls. There is an unforeseen element. after I took pics and walked off I passed a lad. I turned around to catch him fishing out the ball and watched him kick it towards the bridge.

Pics to follow

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Pics

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

I think I might have been lurking at the same time as you, the ball was still in attendance when I charted its movement towards Church.
(Did you have a red cap on.)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Black, green and white addias cap. I finished work early. About 3.05 I made it on to the canal

< Same as in the pic

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Ken Moss just posted this on the local elections thread:

Until I say something that accidentally ends the universe I won't worry about the occasional slip.

Better watch it if he starts talking to that fire extinguisher!

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

I was sure it was you , black trench coat, red rucksack, I am now questioning myself as to the colour of the cap, but it was the right time.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

yeah twas me.

I actually wondered--

You was looking from the bit of the canal that right across from the middle of the building where I work(if you go through the fence and the bushes). I thought "is that Davemac looking over and wondering if I was restless" :D

The coat is a dark blue colour, but the rucksack is red :D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Whatever you do don't throw your rucksack in the canal to join the Fire Extinguisher, could cause untold problems:rolleyes::D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Re. most recent pics: I will be the first to admit that I'm no Sun Tzu, but it seems to me that what is taking place is a tactical move that we in North America refer to as "circling the wagons" ... something big is going to happen soon.

Has any more attempt been made at contact? I take it that quacking didn't work. Perhaps writing the symbol for pi on a piece of styrofoam and putting it in the cut might work ... or, maybe, the first half dozen prime numbers. I admit that I don't have much experience in trying to interact with alien beings, (apart from a few dozen women I've dated); but I do believe it is important that someone try.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Got it, we should have run towards one another in slow motion with a large orchestra playing in the background, or we could just have waved.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

from that distance, with my eyesight it bad as it is was hard to tell anything. I just saw somebody stood there watching me walk down the path :eek:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Right my investigation is complete and I can reveal what I have found.


All the photos taken were for some reason were with the yellow band uppermost. Check previous photos to confirm this.


Well...... I, by accident, found the extinguisher with the section that is always submerged actually out of the water............
I now submit these photos for interpretation by all readers of this thread, be warned when you view these photos, you will not be the same again.


The first photo was the one that made me aware, and the second is when I zoomed in, and what cant speak cant lie. Have a look and tell me what you conclude

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Gordon Bennett !!!:eek: I reckon "Roys" up to his tricks again.:dflam::hehetable

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

I think the ducks are responsible. After all they were present to see how how you reacted.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

They must think we're quackers:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

How do you account for the writing, ducks have no hands, if they tried to write they would just have to wing it.:gif_12:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

If the ducks landed in that extinguisher, then yeh got much to learn Dave, Space Ducks are a different proposition altogether.;)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

if they're aliens, they can do anything, probably just by the power of thought.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

See even you know that susie n yer exiled in Morecambe.:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

They will be forming into a quack regiment, waddle we all do, we will all require tweetment.

I think the parsons nose but hes not saying......as you can tell I just ran out of duck jokes.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

I think the problem may be worse than was at first thought.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Stop it Dave you're quacking me up;):p

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Reckon if the ducks had landed in the extinguisher there would have been firequackers ...looks like it's down to our very own X-Files agents Restless and Dave to quack this case. :)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Surely it's too warm for them round Accy way? Or do they know something we don't know?

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

.... and not a minute too soon;)

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

You may be right ... but I have been paying particular attention to the ducks. I had at first thought that the formation in which they were swimming provided a pictoral, or linguistic clue. But it does seem that the rigidity of the patterns in which they swim implies a mechanical rather than an ornithological origin ... In fact, the ducks may be robotic appendages, a maritime arm of the aliens. The large duck is not the mother, but, to use a naval analogy, the "aircraft carrier" in a robotic naval task force. The smaller ducks are the auxilliary and support craft.

That they look like ducks can be explained by the fact that aliens would design their maritime support craft in a form which would allow them to perform their tasks in the most efficient way possible ... that is, the form of a duck.

The writing on the "extinguisher" is puzzlin' ... Is it possible? ... no, I'll have to give it more thought.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Not only that Dave it now seems its on the weed too:eek: :eek::eek::eek::D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

So the aliens have decided to show themselves... wonder what happens next?

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Expect a visit from

Men in Black - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Ha ha Margaret, I like this bit...

The term is generic, used for any unusual, threatening or strangely behaved individual whose appearance on the scene can be linked in some fashion with a UFO sighting.

Could be describing Davemac and Restless?

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

One of them has the dog

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

What can I say other than...........exterminate.........sorry lost it for a minute........no one has explained the content of post 372.

Other people have some explaining to do............we are the Borg........sorry went again.

So lets have some answers.................we come in peace..........I think I went again:death1::camera8:

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Like to know what you make of it Dave.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

My theory involves satellites, lasers, dematerialisation, and chutney

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Think susie @ Myself offered explanations fer that post, which you are tending to ignore, Which suggests yer one of em.:D

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Well, I just help out when they are busy, but I think you mean something else............ nanoo nanoo

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

a peace offering :p

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Stop pussyfooting - attack it with a pointy stick.

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Hang on, who is holding the camera, and what have you done with the penguins?

Re: Alcohol/Canal
 

Peguin-Tikka Masala for tea.

My workmate holding phone