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The trouble with going to vote,
You listen to each sincere quote, You put your cross in the box, The prepare to take knocks, |
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The trouble with going to vote,
You listen to each sincere quote, You put your cross in the box, Then prepare to take knocks, (had to fix the typo!) |
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The trouble with going to vote,
You listen to each sincere quote, You put your cross in the box, Then prepare to take knocks, 'Cause the b@stards all lied through their throat. |
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the boss has a habbit of picking his nose
and cutting the nails on his toes |
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the boss has a habbit of picking his nose
and cutting the nails on his toes His strange concept of fun |
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[QUOTE=Billcat]the boss has a habbit of picking his nose
and cutting the nails on his toes His strange concept of fun, was to mix up some dough, |
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the boss has a habbit of picking his nose
and cutting the nails on his toes His strange concept of fun, was to mix up some dough, And feed it to everyday Joes. The AccyWeb group's going to meet At the Stag, which is gonna be sweet! |
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The AccyWeb group's going to meet
At the Stag, which is gonna be sweet! If we drink too much beer |
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The AccyWeb group's going to meet
At the Stag, which is gonna be sweet! If we drink too much beer And Pendy is here |
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The AccyWeb group's going to meet
At the Stag, which is gonna be sweet! If we drink too much beer And Pendy is here She just might sweep us all off our feet. |
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Though viruses threaten us all.......
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Though viruses threaten us all.......
There is only one person to call.............. |
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Though viruses threaten us all.......
There is only one person to call........... thats our wonderful doc |
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Though viruses threaten us all.......
There is only one person to call........... thats our wonderful doc who tries to unlock |
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Though viruses threaten us all.......
There is only one person to call........... thats our wonderful doc who tries to unlock the bugs that want to kill us all. |
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While out walking one day
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While out walking one day
a tory councilor passed my way |
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While out walking one day
a tory councilor passed my way smug and snooty was his stance |
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While out walking one day
a tory councilor passed my way smug and snooty was his stance til a dog bit his ass and made him dance |
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While out walking one day
a tory councilor passed my way smug and snooty was his stance til a dog bit his ass and made him dance poor old dog only wanted to play...................... |
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tomorrow we are off to town
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tomorrow we are off to town
having swilled too much ale down |
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tomorrow we are off to town,
having swilled too much ale down, we'll stagger and sway, |
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tomorrow we are off to town,
having swilled too much ale down, we'll stagger and sway, For the rest of the day, |
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Quote:
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Billcat wrote a letter one day,
in which, he had meant to say, |
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Billcat wrote a letter one day,
in which, he had meant to say, All these dealing with Brits has me out of my wits |
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Billcat wrote a letter one day,
in which, he had meant to say, All these dealing with Brits has me out of my wits but its the price i have to pay |
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twas on the good web accy
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twas on the good web accy
that I read a thread that was whacky |
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Twas on the good web accy,
Whilst smoking wacky baccy, |
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Twas on the good web accy,
Whilst smoking wacky baccy, The site made me giggle, |
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Twas on the good web accy,
Whilst smoking wacky baccy, The site made me giggle, it almost made me piddle |
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Twas on the good web accy,
Whilst smoking wacky baccy, The site made me giggle, it almost made me piddle Oh my, that would'a been tacky. |
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It was a hell of a weekend in the Stag
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It was a hell of a weekend in the Stag
When Tealeaf decided to brag |
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It was a hell of a weekend in the Stag
When Tealeaf decided to brag He said: "Look at the size of this thing" |
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It was a hell of a weekend in the Stag
When Tealeaf decided to brag He said: "Look at the size of this thing" Swollen by a bee's sting |
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It was a hell of a weekend in the Stag
When Tealeaf decided to brag He said: "Look at the size of this thing" Swollen by a bee's sting Yea, massive - the size of a fag! (Sorry T me owd mate!):p |
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are you starting another one john?
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Quote:
Grannyclaret and Tealeaf it's said, |
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Grannyclaret and Tealeaf it's said,
With faces turning beet red, |
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Grannyclaret and Tealeaf it's said,
With faces turning beet red, it's an affair that there after |
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.................................................. ...
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Grannyclaret and Tealeaf it's said,
With faces turning beet red, it's an affair that there after could only end in disaster |
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Grannyclaret and Tealeaf it's said,
With faces turning beet red, it's an affair that there after could only end in disaster But then again it could end up in BED!!!!!!!!:rolleyes: __________________ |
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Good one kinky slinky now come along, it's your turn to start us off!
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there was a young swimmer from ossy
paid 500 quid for a cozzy |
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there was a young swimmer from ossy
paid 500 quid for a cozzy but it was 3 sizes too small |
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there was a young swimmer from ossy
paid 500 quid for a cozzy but it was 3 sizes too small and most shocking of all |
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there was a young swimmer from ossy
paid 500 quid for a cozzy but it was 3 sizes too small and off it would fall (almost got me with the word "cozzy." Had to look it up in a slang dictionary.) |
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there was a young swimmer from ossy
paid 500 quid for a cozzy but it was 3 sizes too small and off it would fall "Indecent Exposure", said the Sheriff, with his possie. |
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There was a young swimmer from ossy
paid 500 quid for a cozzy, but it was 3 sizes too small, so she let out some air, |
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OK here's a new one:
It seems some folks can't write things that rhyme, It happens here time after time, |
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It seems some folks can't write things that rhyme,
It happens here time after time, In the limerick form |
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It seems some folks can't write things that rhyme,
It happens here time after time, In the limerick form Five lines are the norm |
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It seems some folks can't write things that rhyme,
It happens here time after time, In the limerick form Five lines are the norm Rhyming AABBA on the dime! |
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We're policing the limericks today
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We're policing the limericks today
So be careful what you say |
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We're policing the limericks today
So be careful what you say Post a rhyme that is weird |
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We're policing the limericks today
So be careful what you say Post a rhyme that is weird but never be feared |
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We're policing the limericks today
So be careful what you say Post a rhyme that is weird but never be feared We're doing it only in play! Speaking of which: There once was a poet named Dan, Who's poetry never would scan. When told this was so, He said, "Yes, I know" "It's because I try to put every possible syllable into the very last line that I can" !! New start: There was a young lady called Sara Who at limericks was quite the terror (call the limerick police!) |
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There was a young lady called Sara
Who at limericks was quite the terror (call the limerick police!) but never fear __________________ |
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There was a young lady called Sara
Who at limericks was quite the terror (call the limerick police!) but never fear she,s realy a dear |
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There was a young lady called Sara
Who at limericks was quite the terror (call the limerick police!) but never fear she,s realy a dear That's our lady called sara |
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In was in the month of May
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it was in the month of May
on a georgeous sunny day |
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it was in the month of May
on a georgeous sunny day when along came an accy web member |
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it was in the month of May
on a georgeous sunny day when along came an accy web member recovering from a bender |
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it was in the month of May
on a georgeous sunny day when along came an accy web member recovering from a bender Oops! Thats not politically correct - I mean gay! |
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Hmmm.....no start of a new limerick. Problem solved -
If you've finished a limerick here, Please don't leave for the pub and a beer, |
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If you've finished a limerick here,
Please don't leave for the pub and a beer, please start another, but not about my mother, |
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If you've finished a limerick here,
Please don't leave for the pub and a beer, please start another, but not about my mother, And her quest to be named as a peer! Tinkerbelle and the lad, Peter Pan, |
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[
Tinkerbelle and the lad, Peter Pan, had both got a beautiful tan |
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Tinkerbelle and the lad, Peter Pan,
had both got a beautiful tan And on the nude beach, |
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Tinkerbelle and the lad, Peter Pan,
had both got a beautiful tan And on the nude beach, he pushed his luck by trying to reach, |
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Tinkerbelle and the lad, Peter Pan,
had both got a beautiful tan And on the nude beach, he pushed his luck by trying to reach, For a boob, the dirty young man. |
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while i was on my way to town
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while i was on my way to town
I bumped into charlie the clown |
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A Tale of Two Cities
|
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while i was on my way to town
I bumped into charlie the clown As he was looking rather sad |
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while i was on my way to town
I bumped into charlie the clown As he was looking rather sad I said "ey, up owd lad!" |
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while i was on my way to town
I bumped into charlie the clown As he was looking rather sad I said "ey, up owd lad!" "Ah bog off" he said with a frown. |
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There was a young lady from Brighton
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Who went to bed with the light on
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There was a young lady from Brighton,
Who went to bed with the light on, "Though I'm afraid of the dark, |
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There was a young lady from Brighton,
Who went to bed with the light on, "Though I'm afraid of the dark, I'm still good for a lark," |
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There was a young lady from Brighton,
Who went to bed with the light on, "Though I'm afraid of the dark, I'm still good for a lark," ! MY GOD its the size of a python ! |
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when i was just a nipper
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when i was just a nipper
Mommy said, "Never play with your zipper," |
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when i was just a nipper
Mommy said, "Never play with your zipper," but she wouldnot say why |
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when i was just a nipper
Mommy said, "Never play with your zipper," but she wouldnot say why till i caught "it" in the fly. |
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when i was just a nipper
Mommy said, "Never play with your zipper," but she wouldnot say why till i caught "it" in the fly. So now she calls me Jack the Ripper! |
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There was a young lady from France,
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There was a young lady from France,
Who offered an exotic dance, |
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There was a young lady from France,
Who offered an exotic dance, she wiggled her hips |
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There was a young lady from France,
Who offered an exotic dance, she wiggled her hips while soliciting tips, |
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There was a young lady from France,
Who offered an exotic dance, she wiggled her hips while soliciting tips, and sent the punters away in a trance |
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tealeaf is now in disgrace
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tealeaf is now in disgrace,
but the thief is not red in the face |
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